It has been a rough winter, both physically and emotionally. I finally got back on the road to health after my encounters with a few flares and now I reside at 40 days without flare-up. A far cry from where I was but I have to meet myself where I am right now. I teach this in all my yoga classes since every time someone walks into the studio they need to climb on their mat as though they are climbing on for the first time without judgement or expectation. I’m in a place in my health where I need to take my own advice and meet me where I am without judgement or expectation. What worked for me a year ago or even a few months ago may not be what will work for me going forward. This is where I start over and re-evaluate my health and my approach.
One of my goals is to go back to basics and work on doing the best I can every day with what my body has to offer. This means a lot of walking again, keeping up my daily yoga practice and teaching, some spinning, very little weight training (only due to the sore in my joints, not because of muscle issues) and eating as healthy as I can. Here is where I find myself stuck, I know exactly what needs to be done, I have been doing this for 14 years, I give advice to other people about what they could try and yet I find myself in a circle of fatigue and needing convenience. There is a balance and finding the balance is the focus, finding the will and strength to push through long enough to find the balance is the struggle. This is probably why I have been dealing with flares off and on all winter. Every time I make some headway my fatigue and body get in my way.
So my first step is to get back outside and walk in the fresh air as much as possible. Obviously the temp has to be high 30’s F or greater for this to happen but believe it or not we have had a several day. While the rest of the US is looking at spring in a couple of weeks it can be end of April before we really experience spring in Maine so I grab any mild day I can and just bundle up and walk. My body and soul actually feel great and I find myself smiling each walk I finish. This doesn’t mean I cannot walk inside it just means I prefer not to. I’m being tested and just have to take each day as a new day and figure out what I need that day. Sometimes I choose correctly, but sometimes I don’t. Even after all these years I’m still trying to find the balance that works.