As much as I want to ignore it and pretend it is not happening I am in flare. After 440 days my body has decided to revolt for whatever reason and has turned on me. I have been feeling so strong and so good for so long but this morning I woke up and my body was hurting, I have a fever, I have a sore throat and my hair feels different and it hurts to touch it. There is no denying that I’m in flare with all those symptoms. I have to take it easy, bring my body back to life in my new normal and start again. It does give me hope that I went as long as I did but it is a reality that I still have MCTD. Sometimes you wonder if you are cured when you go long periods of time but I will never be cured.
What caused this flare? It could be the weather, it could be that I didn’t sleep for nearly a week and my body just couldn’t take the exhaustion anymore. It could just be because I got into something or near someone that had a virus and I caught a little bug. Either way it doesn’t really matter what happened but it did happen and now once I feel better I start the process over again. I do believe that I can go the distance again but I need my body to get back to normal again in order to start the process and it might take several days to get back to my new normal before I can start the process.
As much as I’m disappointed I’m also so grateful that I went as long as I did and that my body was strong enough to last 440 days without a flare. It gives me great hope to do it all over again. Maybe even get to 500 days this next time but certainly I need to get better and back on track.