EVERYTHING IS NORMAL?

A few weeks ago I was writing about feeling out of whack and hormonally out of balance and trying to find my normal again.  I was certain something was off and trying desperately to figure it out.  I was meeting with different doctors and explaining feeling a little out of balance and dealing with bouts of high blood pressure and certain that my hormones were off somewhere and once I had them figured out it would be so much.  Over the last few weeks I have been feeling better, still a bit less of patients but not teetering on the edge of life most days.

I went and had a full lab panel done.  My results came back as fabulous as they could come back. My doctor wrote me a note saying if I’m out of balance it isn’t showing in any of my labs.  All my numbers were incredible and I have been getting daily normal blood pressure readings as well so perhaps this is mental for me.  I definitely feel stronger today than I did even a few weeks ago.  As I’m running my sprints I chant to myself that my body is strong and I truly believe it.

When I’m in Bikram and the humidity is high and the room is hot, I thank my body for what it is enduring for me.  Mentally I’m very strong in that Bikram studio and in life I feel mentally and physically strong so I’m still on the search to find out where my feeling of lack of balance is coming from.   Perhaps I feel pulled in too many directions and need to tighten up the reigns of life and pick and choose more carefully as to not out stretch myself.  I need to focus on doing things I truly love and let some other things go and not worry about them.  My husband is a good gauge for me when I’m over doing it but I tend to not want to hear it. I have decided I do want to hear it and gave him permission to tell me so.  The trick is to be kind when he does tell me because I asked for it even I don’t believe it.

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