On Friday I did one of my heavy weight lifting sessions and proceeded with my day as normal but on Saturday my day wasn’t starting out so normal. I woke up with a really sore body. I chalked it up to my weight training and proceeded on with my day.  When I got to Bikram I was noticing that my body didn’t really want to move in the way I wanted it to move.  My cardio was fine during class but I was feeling sore and a bit tired. After class I came home and told my husband I wasn’t sure exactly what was happening but that I was tired and taking a nap.  A few hours later I woke up with the same body soreness as I had gone to bed with. 

The rest of the evening was very similar and today everything is back to normal so either I pushed it too hard on Friday and my body had to recover and by doing so I put myself into flare-up or it was normal body ache after a strenuous work out.  The hard thing with MCTD is that it is fine line and really could be a factor of both but it is hard to tell. I’m someone who is pretty connected to my body and can read signs and triggers but even after 10 years of dealing with MCTD I still have trouble reading all the signs.

My goal is to get stronger, the obstacle is my body doesn’t like anything different to happen to it and so it turns on itself causing me to wonder where to draw the line and how to make this work.  I have many months behind me of working out hard but not flaring.  I have seen my body get stronger and I have appreciated all this body can do. I want to push it gently and see if we can’t make it even stronger but not at the risk of frequently flaring.  I was frequently flaring when I was training with other personal trainers and when I flare I literally start at the beginning so I was constantly starting at the beginning with all these trainers. 

My new trainer has been able to get me to a good level of fitness in about 7 months and perhaps I should just be patient and work her program and see what happens. I’m choosing the 3rd day to really train hard because all the information tells me to lift heavy things.  Every podcast I turn on, every book I open now, every article I read all says the same, lift heavy things.  Truth be told, I can lift heavy things and I don’t worry so much about hurting myself.  There was a time when I was gingerly lifting weights for fear of my shoulders or wrists and even elbows.  Now I just do it. 

After my nap yesterday my husband and I moved a pallet of pellets for our stove which equals a ton a pellets.  My body was hurting but I was more than able to move each and every 50 lbs bag right along side of him.  This body of mine does incredible things most days. There are days I wake up extremely angry at this same body but I quickly remind myself what it can do and when it can’t it means it needs rest.  I hear all these stories about people who had, past tense, had an autoimmune disease. I find that incredible since I have been told I will always have, past, present, future, have this disease. I want this body to never hurt again and I want to be one of the past tense champions.


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