Today I’m very excited because my 2 month old nephew is coming over to spend the day with me. My heart fills up so much when I see him and he just puts life into perspective for me. These are the moments I live for and these are the moments that remind me I need to be as strong as I can be so I can spend time with him and not let my fatigue get the better of me. There will come a time in his life when he will want me to take him hiking, biking, rollerblading, skiing, skating, snow shoeing, kayaking and anything else he finds interesting. I will be the aunt that can do this with him and keep up with him. In the coming years as he grows and develops there will be so much on his mind and I can’t wait to have some really fun conversations with him and find out what he knows and what he wants to learn.
The love I feel for him is overwhelming and exciting. As I hold him I realize that my inflamed sausage fingers swallow up his tiny little hands and feet. I’m a petite woman with monster hands, sometimes purple monster hands so it looks interesting to outside eyes but he will grow up knowing that this is part of who I am. It is Me VS MCTD and these moments make me fight even harder. This little boy and I have a lot to accomplish together and share together. Pain, stiffness, medications, fatigue, and inflammation will not stand in my way. I have found the strongest love in the tiniest little package. The sparkle in my eyes for him lingers long after he has gone home and I wait for our next time together and cherish every time together with him.